I remembered about a year ago, me & my "so-called" friend had a dispute about finding "The Perfect Man". At that point of time, she wasn't in a relationship yet. I was still at the early stages of my relationship wif BF. The dispute wasn't really a heated argument. I guess at some point during the course of our decent conversation, it turned into a hot debate about her "perfect gentleman" VS my "not-so-perfect" former and current BFs/BF.
She HAD been in a relationship only once, as I recall. And it lasted only 3 months. And throughout the whole relationship, her BF had been telling lies all along, and played around wif her heart. The situation climaxed when one day her BF told her that he was admitted into Changi Hospital suffering from a certain sickness, and she rushed all the way down to the hospital only to find that the situation wasn't actually true. How Stoopid. And from then on, she couldn't trust guys anymore.
I, on the other hand... have been dating around and been in short term relationships since I broke up wif my 1st love in 2001. And every time I was in a new r/s, I'd show their pictures to this "so-called" friend. The comments are ALWAYS negative. So Expected of her. She always had someting to criticize about the persons I was currently dating at that time. She wasn't supportive of my decisions and wasn't keen on the idea of achieving happiness by being in that simple yet short relationship at all. Sometimes, it felt as if she doesn't respect me as a person and as her friend. Most of the time, I just wanted to give her a tight slap and wake her up from her constant criticizing and negative feedbacks about me and my relationships.
Aniwaes, the debate centred around her idea of the "perfect gentleman". I wouldn't describe the characteristics lah. Got so many. But just hang around the idea of "perfect" and u'll know what I mean. It means the total opposite of jerks, motherfathers, liars and guys whom u've once loved so much but end up hurting u so much that the pain was so unbearable.
I kept emphasizing to her that there is NO such person as the "perfect gentleman". But she kept opposing my opinion. She's so stubborn!
She believes that one day she'll meet her dream guy, the guy who knows what to say at any given situation, someone good, decent with lots of money, someone responsible and kind and "layak" to be with her. Hahaha... but my dear friend.... that is all only a DREAM. I dun believe in all that. Our mothers read to us the same Fairytales that was read to them when they were young. Cinderella, Beauty and the Beast and Sleeping Beauty all met with their Prince Charming and lived HAPPILY EVER AFTER. But life's ain't a fairytale. If only life WAS a fairytale... all of us would live HAPPILY EVER AFTER wif our Prince Charming - the one and the only perfect guy for us. Cuz the truth is my dear friend, Prince Charming doesn't exist in reality.
The guys that I have been wif or I am wif now... they may not be the "Perfect Gentleman" like u always dreamed of, but they were the perfect solution to fill up an empty soul. The presence of a man in my life doesn't necessarily have to complete me, but just their company and our shared experiences, is good enough for me. Some of them may be money swindlers, using my hard-earned cash at any given opportunity, some just wanna have fun, some gave a thousand empty promises... but one thing's for sure, I've never come across the "perfect gentleman". Is there such a man? R u Sure u can find your DREAM GUY?
Even IF there's a DREAM GUY, I'm sure he's not totally perfect. There may be thousands of flaws surrounding him. You may never know. I watched The Oprah Winfrey Show. This lady lead a luxurious life filled with trips to France, Greece, Maldives, had a private jet, a private yacht and had a 5-storey townhouse. Her husband was a doctor and she'd been married to him for 3 yrs. He was not only the most intelligent guy she'd ever been wif.. but he was her best friend. He said all the perfect words she wanted to hear at the right time. To me, he was such a manipulative idiot. On her birthday, he left her mysteriously and never came back but a check wif the banking account stated that his account was still up and running and that he was still alive. He left her wif 6 million dollars in debt. 6 MILLION DOLLARS! No word from him at all. So pls ladies... there is NO such person as the "perfect gentleman" or "dream guy" or "perfect man" whatsoever. Dun let guys take advantage of our vulnerability as weak women. Some of us may be weeping, crying and getting emotional over breakups with BFs whom we thought were perfect for us when at the current moment, he may sipping champagne with another women and laughing at our stoopidity and how easily we believe his promises and fall into his trap when all he ever wanted was a bit of fun. It's not easy to think about this, but Reality Bites. And it bites deep and hard. If he doesn't take us seriously, chances are... we're just another stepping stone for him.
Thinking about BF... he may not be perfect one, he's not rich, doesn't always say the right words, and we seldom spend time wif each other. He may not be Prince Charming, but he does listens to whatever I say, and takes it seriously. To be wif him may not be the best option in life, but its the best option at this moment. I cherish him too much :)
She HAD been in a relationship only once, as I recall. And it lasted only 3 months. And throughout the whole relationship, her BF had been telling lies all along, and played around wif her heart. The situation climaxed when one day her BF told her that he was admitted into Changi Hospital suffering from a certain sickness, and she rushed all the way down to the hospital only to find that the situation wasn't actually true. How Stoopid. And from then on, she couldn't trust guys anymore.
I, on the other hand... have been dating around and been in short term relationships since I broke up wif my 1st love in 2001. And every time I was in a new r/s, I'd show their pictures to this "so-called" friend. The comments are ALWAYS negative. So Expected of her. She always had someting to criticize about the persons I was currently dating at that time. She wasn't supportive of my decisions and wasn't keen on the idea of achieving happiness by being in that simple yet short relationship at all. Sometimes, it felt as if she doesn't respect me as a person and as her friend. Most of the time, I just wanted to give her a tight slap and wake her up from her constant criticizing and negative feedbacks about me and my relationships.
Aniwaes, the debate centred around her idea of the "perfect gentleman". I wouldn't describe the characteristics lah. Got so many. But just hang around the idea of "perfect" and u'll know what I mean. It means the total opposite of jerks, motherfathers, liars and guys whom u've once loved so much but end up hurting u so much that the pain was so unbearable.
I kept emphasizing to her that there is NO such person as the "perfect gentleman". But she kept opposing my opinion. She's so stubborn!
She believes that one day she'll meet her dream guy, the guy who knows what to say at any given situation, someone good, decent with lots of money, someone responsible and kind and "layak" to be with her. Hahaha... but my dear friend.... that is all only a DREAM. I dun believe in all that. Our mothers read to us the same Fairytales that was read to them when they were young. Cinderella, Beauty and the Beast and Sleeping Beauty all met with their Prince Charming and lived HAPPILY EVER AFTER. But life's ain't a fairytale. If only life WAS a fairytale... all of us would live HAPPILY EVER AFTER wif our Prince Charming - the one and the only perfect guy for us. Cuz the truth is my dear friend, Prince Charming doesn't exist in reality.
The guys that I have been wif or I am wif now... they may not be the "Perfect Gentleman" like u always dreamed of, but they were the perfect solution to fill up an empty soul. The presence of a man in my life doesn't necessarily have to complete me, but just their company and our shared experiences, is good enough for me. Some of them may be money swindlers, using my hard-earned cash at any given opportunity, some just wanna have fun, some gave a thousand empty promises... but one thing's for sure, I've never come across the "perfect gentleman". Is there such a man? R u Sure u can find your DREAM GUY?
Even IF there's a DREAM GUY, I'm sure he's not totally perfect. There may be thousands of flaws surrounding him. You may never know. I watched The Oprah Winfrey Show. This lady lead a luxurious life filled with trips to France, Greece, Maldives, had a private jet, a private yacht and had a 5-storey townhouse. Her husband was a doctor and she'd been married to him for 3 yrs. He was not only the most intelligent guy she'd ever been wif.. but he was her best friend. He said all the perfect words she wanted to hear at the right time. To me, he was such a manipulative idiot. On her birthday, he left her mysteriously and never came back but a check wif the banking account stated that his account was still up and running and that he was still alive. He left her wif 6 million dollars in debt. 6 MILLION DOLLARS! No word from him at all. So pls ladies... there is NO such person as the "perfect gentleman" or "dream guy" or "perfect man" whatsoever. Dun let guys take advantage of our vulnerability as weak women. Some of us may be weeping, crying and getting emotional over breakups with BFs whom we thought were perfect for us when at the current moment, he may sipping champagne with another women and laughing at our stoopidity and how easily we believe his promises and fall into his trap when all he ever wanted was a bit of fun. It's not easy to think about this, but Reality Bites. And it bites deep and hard. If he doesn't take us seriously, chances are... we're just another stepping stone for him.
Thinking about BF... he may not be perfect one, he's not rich, doesn't always say the right words, and we seldom spend time wif each other. He may not be Prince Charming, but he does listens to whatever I say, and takes it seriously. To be wif him may not be the best option in life, but its the best option at this moment. I cherish him too much :)
